How to Prepare a Parenting Plan in Maine

During a divorce with minor children in Maine, it’s essential to prepare a viable parenting plan. Getting this part right can save time, expenses, and stress as the spouses work out how they will co-parent the children after they separate.

However, addressing emotional issues where you may not see eye to eye on all the details can be challenging for parents.

It helps to understand the steps required before writing a parenting plan, so that you and your spouse enter discussions with realistic expectations and in the right spirit for a satisfactory outcome for your children and you.

Here’s what you need to know about preparing a parenting plan in Maine.

Parenting minor children and caring for their needs is a priority during divorces. A parenting plan is usually the cornerstone of these efforts, establishing clear guidelines and expectations for family members, while keeping parents in control of decisions (rather than the courts).

The Maine courts prefer that parents collaborate on a parenting plan that covers the following issues:

• The child’s living arrangements
• Time spent between the child and each parent
• Financial issues, like child support agreements
• How important decisions are made for the children
• How the plan may be modified after submission to the court

If no acceptable parenting plan is submitted to the court during a divorce, the court will order custody and visitation based on the child’s best interests. In other words, a judge will decide how you parent your child.

Starting early with preparing your plan can prevent this. The goal should be for both parents to agree to the terms of the parenting plan and have it approved by the family court. Once approved by a judge, it is binding.

Prepare a checklist of items to discuss with your spouse, focusing on how you will support your child’s physical needs and create a stable, nurturing environment for the child’s development. This will require well-defined responsibilities and actions from both parents, which should be detailed in the plan.

Think of this as cooperating and collaborating like a business team aiming to achieve mutual goals, i.e., the happiness and well-being of your child. If you cannot devise a parenting plan through negotiations with your spouse, try mediation.

Your parenting plan will only be approved by a judge if it meets certain criteria, most notably the best interests of the child.

An effective parenting plan keeps the well-being of the child at its heart, rather than the wishes of the parents. Many times, these coincide but emotions can get the better of some parents during divorces, and they can lose sight of the main goals of the parenting plan.

A divorce can be a period of great turmoil and transition for a child. Parents who collaborate for the family’s well-being are more likely to be successful with parenting after the divorce has been finalized.

In determining a child’s best interests, the Maine courts will consider the following factors, amongst others:

• The child’s age
• The relationship of the child with each parent
• The child’s preference, if the child is old enough to express a preference
• The stability of living arrangements
• The capacity of each parent to cooperate with the other parent
• The existence of domestic violence between the parents
• Anything else the court thinks is relevant to its decision

Be wary of overcommitting in terms of time or finances when preparing your parenting plan. The plan should dictate how you and your spouse share time and resources for the well-being of your child, so it needs to be realistic.

Parenting schedules (who spends time with the child through weekdays, weekends, holidays, special events, etc.) will vary from couple to couple. A 50/50 split may not be realistic if one parent is particularly busy at work or lives far away.

Your child’s best interests are served by having a plan and sticking to it rather than committing to unrealistic schedules. This can be modified as the child matures.

With parenting plans, the devil is in the details. The more specific you can be, the better, as this will provide a clear path ahead for you as a family living apart.

This even applies to communication plans. How and when you communicate with the co-parent should be detailed and committed to. Decide how you and the co-parent will stay in touch and share updates about your child.

Without this structured approach, things can quickly become disorganized and erratic, especially when the child starts moving between homes. Communication breakdowns can affect the stability of the child’s environment and produce conflict.

Structure communications as you might do at work, approaching problems with positivity, courtesy, and a goal in mind.

The two major decisions for parents concerning their children when separating are:

1. How do we support and care for the child’s daily needs?
2. How do we make the major decisions in the child’s life?

The first decision is addressed by the physical custody arrangement (who the child spends time with and primarily resides with) and child support payments (see below).

The second decision refers to legal custody over the child, which is usually shared in Maine. If both parents are involved in decision-making, as is generally seen as healthy for the child, a parenting plan needs to address how these decisions will be made.

Key decisions such as education, healthcare, religion, and cultural upbringing must be addressed. Your parenting plan should document your initial decisions, how you will communicate on these matters in the future, and how you will address any emergencies that arise.

Both parents share the responsibility for financially supporting their child at least until the age of majority (18) in Maine.

Because one parent usually spends more time with the child than the other, child support helps redress the balance for paying the essential living costs plus any extra expenses incurred. This is usually court-ordered upon request from one parent, but the parenting plan may also address the financial obligations of the parents if an agreement is made in the child’s best interests.

As you prepare your parenting plan, keep the following in mind:

• Detail
• Cooperation
• Long-term goals
• Flexibility

Detail keeps things specific and helps both parents commit to action; cooperation keeps communications business-like rather than emotional; long-term goals help you focus on what’s best for the future of the child; and flexibility allows you to modify your parenting plans as the child grows.

A parenting plan will only be approved by the Maine courts if it addresses the child’s fundamental needs and is in their best interests. If there are omissions, inconsistencies, or disputed matters, the plan will need to be reworked or a judge will need to make parenting orders.

Having your plan reviewed by a seasoned divorce or child custody attorney before submitting it to the court can save valuable time, money, and energy.

For legal assistance with any aspect of a divorce in Maine, speak to an experienced family law attorney at The Maine Divorce Group during an initial consultation.